It’s check-in time at our house! I’m not talking about the mid-term reports we have to hand in to the DEM (which we all love to write, don’t we? Hi hi!), but a short personal assessment that I do periodically with my kids.
I like to ask them what they like about their homeschool or their life in general. This allows me to ” keep my finger on the pulse ” of each one, so to speak. Sometimes, if I’m open to their negative comments (which I may not always be, because it can feel confrontational or be convicting!), I also ask them what they don’t like about their lives, what bothers them, what they’d like to change…
In the daily organization of my home school, I try to reconcile the demands of the DEM, the preferences of my children and also my responsibilities towards them and towards God. This is not always possible, of course, since children tend to want to avoid what seems difficult or unpleasant to them, to make as little effort as possible for something they are not interested in or do not see the importance of. They have a selfish streak (it has to be said!) that means they don’t necessarily consider the family situation as a whole, but often only their own interests.
Despite this, I try to take their point of view into account and give them special attention. This is not easy to do, because there is a temptation to brush aside things that seem disturbing or too difficult to do. An already exhausted, overworked, or anxious mom doesn’t need more guilt or burden placed on her shoulders….
Once, when I asked my children, I was surprised to learn that one of them, who was 12 years old, was greatly disturbed by the fact that his bedroom door, broken, had not been replaced… We had simply put a curtain to close the opening and thought that was enough at that time. Another child had told me that he didn’t like the fact that there were several bins of clothes stacked and permanently stored in his room, taking up a lot of space. At first glance, with my adult eyes, I thought these details were insignificant, that these kids were somewhat temperamental and should be able to put up with things not being perfectly to their liking. But as I thought about it a little more, I realized that it was probably worthwhile for me to try to accommodate them as much as possible. In the end, in both of these cases, we made the effort to find solutions to remedy these problems and the children involved were glad to have their voices heard!
Sometimes, when I ask my children what they like to do or what they consider positive about their daily lives, it is to continue to do what they like (if it is feasible, of course!) or do activities that are enjoyable for them more often. I try to develop in them the virtues of perseverance, meticulousness and self-discipline, while respecting their preferences and tastes.
Hearing them name what they like and enjoy can give us something to rejoice about and be encouraged by!
Recently, when I asked my children what they liked about their homeschool, two of them said they liked it when I read books aloud to them (these days it’s “Little Britches” by Ralph Moody!). This encouraged me because I didn’t know if they really enjoyed it or if it was just me! Hi hi! Others said they liked it when I cooked special dishes.
Finally, taking stock of one’s journey can be an opportunity for God to speak to us or reveal things we need to change in our lives. Sometimes we need to take action and other times we just need to realize that we can’t do anything more or better at that moment, and surrender to God. And finally, there are times when we should realize that we are doing pretty well at everything we need to do! It warms the heart and the soul when everything goes well enough and every child is happy, doesn’t it?
Happy December to everyone!
